Archive for the Random Randoms Category

Metrofail. Again.

Posted in Random Randoms on June 26, 2010 by starstripe


The trains during the World Cup have done anything but run on time. “The such and such a train from Simons Town to Cape Town has been cancelled, we apologise for the inconvenience” is a great line we hear blared over the loudspeakers in a barely distinguishable accent, almost daily. Fantastic, that just makes everything all better. Take a few weeks ago as an example. I had a doctor’s appointment after work at 6, and this is one of those doctors who you pay for if you don’t turn up. You’d think an hour would be sufficient for me to get from work to the doc, seeing as I work across the road from the station and the trip is 20 minutes. But no, thanks to Metrorail I didn’t get there on time. My train was cancelled. The next train, 15 minutes later, left late. Then the train broke down and stopped on the tracks for 10 minutes. I got there at about 6.20, having left work at 5. 

On Wednesday, the train I was on broke down and all the lights went out. Now, at 7 in the evening, this was such a lovely experience – being surrounded by a group of strangers in a dark train carriage. This was after my original train was cancelled, and the next train to leave was late coming in so we were late to leave. The estimated leaving time of the train kept moving 1 or 2 minutes forward. Now, the board with the train times and platforms had told us our train was leaving from platform 7. Then, Metrorail announced that it will be leaving from platform 3. You’d think someone could update that on the board seeing as its electrical. But wait, only one of the boards announcing the train times is actually working, the other is blank. This is happening during the World Cup people. 

The people on the trains are also pretty retarded. In the morning during rush hour, the trains get so full that you can’t get on them. But on closer inspection, you notice that there is lots of standing space further down the carriages, but people still choose to hover around the door, as if moving down the carriage is some threat to their personal safety. Common sense much? NO! Not any! When I board the train, I usually move further down the carriage so I don’t have to stand squelched next to someone who hasn’t discovered good hygiene, and also so people are able to get into the carriages. 

You should see people’s faces when I say ‘excuse me, can I get past please, there is so much space there.’ They look as if I have kicked them in the groin with a steel capped boot. The look of utter horror and shock as I push through to get to some space is unbelievable. I have seen people unable to board the trains because they are so full around the doors, but have standing room further down the carriage. It is as if people cannot put 2 and 2 together: crowded space next to un crowded space – move to un crowded space and crowded space becomes less crowded. 

Another joy of train rides is the token DJ, playing music from their phone to the whole carriage. Oh yeah, we all want to listen to Akon or other drivel like that after working a long, crappy day and getting rained on for 10 minutes before boarding the train, Thanks buddy, it’s all good now I have your cellphone music in my ears. It’s a real treat when you get not one, but two wanna be DJs on the train! What joy! And neither one wants to give up their music so we sit, listening to two shitty RnB/Hip Hop artists for 20 minutes, AT THE SAME TIME. 

Last but not least is chivalry. It seems to be pretty dead. I have seen elderly women standing on trains, while twenty-something, healthy men are sitting happily on the seats. I have seen pregnant women standing too. If I am lucky enough to get a seat and I see a pregnant woman or an elderly person – I give up my seat. It’s just good manners. This would be another time when people’s mouths drop open in shock. The other day I gave my seat to an elderly lady and after the (once again) horrified stares from people in the carriage I felt like shouting ‘well it seems I have more balls than all the men on this train so I thought I had better behave like man is supposed to, and offer her my seat.’ 

I really need to get my driver’s license, and get away from these morons. Metrorail morons and passenger morons.


Rant rant rant rant

Posted in Random Randoms, Uncategorized on April 7, 2010 by starstripe

When am I going to meet a man that does not have ‘conditions’ attached to him?

I am so fed up of hearing utter crap like:

“I don’t do housework, paid work, wash often or mix with your friends. That’s just the way it is.”

“I work away on oil rigs for months at a time and have lied about screwing your housemate. That’s just the way it is.”

“My best friend is a pregnant pre-divorcee and I am willingly filling in the role of the absentee dad. That’s just the way it is.”

“I have a problem with heroin and crack and will steal your stuff. Oh, and I cheated on you. That’s just the way it is.”

Where do I find these guys?

I mean, is it ME that causes this? I can go overboard on the paranoia, but do you blame me?


Mugged AGAIN. Gosh, darn it.

Posted in Random Randoms, Uncategorized with tags , , , , on March 20, 2010 by starstripe

Last night a friend, her boyfriend and I were mugged in the lovely hippy-town of Observatory.

To be quite honest, I used to live in Obs myself, and lets just say, two of my exes had dreadlocks and “only smoked hash, man.”

In the years I have lived in Cape Town (since 2001), I was mugged, had a gun pointed in my face during a robbery, had my house robbed when I was at work on two occasions, a friend from university’s boyfriend was murdered, a friend was murdered, two people I know have been stabbed, the list goes on.

Part of me is shaken, the other part angry. I find it so arrogant when people take something that is not theirs, and they have not worked hard for.

Now my friend has been left without a bag, a phone, any ID documents (she’s foreign so this is a big problem), flat keys or her university notes. Worst of all, her diary was taken, a complete violation of her privacy.

But, rather than continue to bitch or give in to my sudden interest in leaving the country, I am trying to get on with things.

There are so many things that annoy me about South Africa, but there are so many more things I love.

But ‘skaroo’ those assholes that mugged us. I hope they don’t come out as good as they did the next time they attack someone.


Posted in Random Randoms on April 9, 2009 by starstripe

Yes MetroRail, I really do hate you. You are the epitome of the South African incompetence that I am so sick of. Here I sit on a broken down train that is supposed to be the express train. The only thing express about this train is how quickly it is pissing me off.

On Wednesday night, I worked late. There is a train which leaves the station at 6.58pm exactly and I was on the platform at 6.57pm wondering where the bloody train was. I asked a guard who was standing near to me and probably needs therapy after dealing with me.

‘Excuse me, but where is the train?’ I asked her. ‘Oh it left already’ she replied with a beaming smile. ‘How can it have left already?’ I bellowed, ‘look at the board, it is not meant to leave for one more minute!’ ‘Oh’ she replied, ‘there is another train at half past seven from platform 5’ she beamed. ‘But why did the train leave early! It does this all the time!’ I shrieked. ‘Oh, I don’t know, sorry, you have to complain to the manager if you have a problem.’ ‘Well, seeing as I have over half an hour to kill, I’ll go and do that, where is their office?’ I asked, to which she replied, beaming smile intact still, despite the fact that I had steam coming out of my nose, ‘oh sorry madam, the office is closed’.

I’m very proud of myself however as I managed to restrain myself from punching her teeth out. But this is a daily occurrence with Metrorail. Trains leaving early, leaving late, not arriving at all or breaking down. And this is the best part- on the odd occasion that they do announce delays, their way of making it up to everyone who is late for work is to say… ‘we apologise for the inconvenience caused’. Bastards.

I don’t even know why I bother to buy a ticket, as the guards are usually too busy gossiping amongst themselves to check that my ticket is valid. As usual, the monopoly wins.


Posted in Random Randoms, Uncategorized on March 20, 2009 by starstripe

Table Mountain fire:

SPCA rescues injured wildlife COGH SPCA Chief Inspector Andries Venter carries the severly burnt grysbokkie to safety.

Andries Ventre with injured bokkie

Andries Venter with injured bokkie

When they found the bokkie

The greysbokkie when we found her

Wildlife is the main casualty of the fires on Table Mountain – and the SPCA has had its hands full with urgent rescue and relief missions.Although numerous wild animals have been rescued, more casualties are expected while the fire still burns – and in its aftermath – and SPCA Inspectors remain on full alert. To date, no domestic animals appear to have been affected, but the SPCA urges pet owners to keep a close eye on their dogs and cats. One of the heartbreaking casualties of the fire was a grysbok, whose plight was brought to the attention of SPCA Chief Inspector Andries Venter by the City of Cape Town’s Disaster Management team. The grysbok was found in a quarry near Vredehoek, with severe burn wounds on its legs and face. It was unable to move because of its injuries. The animal was rushed to Dr George Coury at Citi Vet in Gardens, where it was put on a drip and given emergency treatment for its pain and injuries. Unfortunately it suffered internal injuries from smoke inhalation and passed away.

To report injured animals – or for more information about the SPCA’s rescue efforts – please call 021 700 4158/9 or contact the SPCA after hours emergency number: 083 326 1604.


Posted in Random Randoms on March 17, 2009 by starstripe

Dilemma. I have much to write about. But my topics generally concern people I am good friends with and who read my blog.

When I am wanting to rant or talk about something in my life that is reasonably humorous and good blog fodder, there is always the ‘risk’ (certifiable DEFINITE chance) that someone will read it who knows that I am talking about them and get pissed off.

Oh the dilemma.

I’ll just write about people who don’t read my blog.

Serves them right for not reading it.

ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!! *%&#$^#*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted in Random Randoms with tags , , , , , , , , on March 12, 2009 by starstripe

I am seething right now. Abso-fucking-lutely SEETHING.

As previously mentioned, my complete DOOS of an ex-boyfriend likes his facebook profile picture to be of him and his new, shiny faced, big teethed girlfriend. And the most recent pic he has as his profile picture (and no, I am not friends with him on FB, I deleted his cheating, crack smoking, heroin injecting, money stealing, manipulative ass) is of him and the GF as per usual. Bit in this pic, he is wearing my sodding hoodie that I bought with my first ever pay cheque, when I was 22. I could kill. And that pay cheque was important to me because it was the first sign that I was capable of being a responsible adult after I cleaned up. And now that bastard is wearing it in his profile pic. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

I felt sorry for him last year, and lent him two of my hoodies that didn’t fit me anymore. A black hoodie from Bushido in Cape Town, which is one of about three that they had at the time, the only one in black, and my UCT hoodie I bought in 1st year (2001) as an innocent 17 year old, learning to find my way after leaving home. Both hoodies have a lot of value to me. And I guess I was stupid for giving them to him. But did the ass-face have to wear one in his profile pic?

I have done this before though. I had an incredible Blur tshirt from the time that Country House was released. My sister went to their concert in London when we lived just outside the big city, and I was too young to go. She never wore the tshirt so I appropriated it. I then gave it to another ex because he loved Blur. And the first time I saw him 3 months after we broke up, he was wearing it. But that particular ex is decent so I don’t mind him having it. I do regret giving it away thought.

I have learned my lesson. No more giving away stuff made of complete awesomeness to please people I love. Because invariably they show their true colours and I regret having done so.

Seriously, I hope this ex gets run over. Actually, he was hit by a taxi when he was on his motor bike, which pleased me greatly.

I was even considering making peace with this guy later this year. Not now. I will just be asking for my two hoodies back and the R6000 he owes me (which he stole to buy crack with).